Together 4ever

After a few months or a few years in marriage, it is very common to start losing interest in your spouse. The marriage graph takes an unexpected downfall. You begin to notice your spouse’s character flaws and unpleasant mannerisms. Arguments and disagreements compound and they sometimes end in near fights. You realize that the explosive sexual passion of the honeymoon is gone and you are beginning to be less and less sexually attracted to your spouse. You begin to doubt whether you made the right decision marrying him or her. You begin to question whether your spouse is the right person for you. A thick cloud of confusion envelopes your mind. You wonder if your spouse is feeling the same. You honestly love your spouse and dislike him or her at the same time. Fear not. You are not alone and there is nothing wrong with your marriage. This is a normal but temporary phase that almost every marriage goes through. Don’t dismiss the temporary feelings but don’t make permanent decisions based on them. The unsustainable euphoric feelings of falling in love are gradually fading. A new and permanent phase of growing in love is beginning. From here going forward, feelings take the passenger seat and love for your spouse is driven by decisions, and not by feelings. Whatever happens during this phase, do not quit or give up. Continue to choose to love your spouse and continue to choose to stay. Couples that survive this second phase of marriage often discover that the next phase of their marriage is more fulfilling than the first one, and divorce is not even an option. – Isaac Kubvoruno